Apr 7, 2016

Pearls Before Swine

I don't know how many of you know the scripture Matthew 7:6, but here it is, "Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces." 
I'm starting my blog off with this because this is the basis of how my husband treats me. Let's start from the beginning.
When Dave and I first met, and even on our 1st couple dates; Dave looked at me as a girl he'd date a few times, make out with, get drunk with, and then, onto the next. If we're being honest, that's how we felt about each other. Neither of us were looking for a relationship. We thought the other person was hot, so let's kick it for a few days and move along. Isn't this the point of dating? Meet a ton of different people, learn what you like and don't, and have as much fun as possible?! At least, that was my point of dating experiences.
After hanging out with each other a few times though, things changed between Dave and me. We both felt it, we were aware that it was happening, and that meant that things were going to be different. Nothing scared me more in my life. It scared the hell out of Dave too. What scared him the most though, was realizing that I was the girl his Dad has raised him to love, and protect.
A little about my Father in Law. He and my mother in law have been married 40 years (I think. Don't quote me). Lou, (my father in law) treats Paula, (my mother in law) like she is the most precious thing on this earth. I've never met a more respectful, classy, protective, and non-controlling man, in all my life. He treats his wife the way that he taught his son to treat his future wife. He treats her as though she's the hope diamond. The most precious thing on this earth. He never degrades her, speaks poorly about her, and really just chooses to leave her out of conversations, unless it's speaking about her in the most high regard.
When my friends met Dave, they thought it was weird how he wouldn't talk about our intimate life. He would smile as his friends and mine, spoke about their relationships. He'd laugh at their stories, and have great conversations about them and their lives. He simply chose to never discuss ours. My friends thought that he was controlling, insecure, and didn't love me like I claimed. I would simply smile and tell them that I understood why they felt that way. The truth is though, is that he loves me perfectly.
To this day my Dad will make funny jokes, he's a pervert and is always making some funny comment about sex. Dave and I are constantly laughing at him. Dave's friends will text him about little funny quirks in their personal relationships, and he simply listens. Something Dave has never done though, is follow up about a story with me. He protects me. He keeps me safe. He keeps me separate from the world. Why does he do this? As Dave told me today in a text, "You're too good for this world."
I'm not telling you this to say how amazing I am, because that's simply not true. I'm telling you this because I never in a million years, imagined that I would be treasured in such a way. I never knew that THIS existed. I didn't know that there was a love and respect above anything that I had ever known in my life. I didn't know that there was a love where your entire purpose is to protect that person. Now I do.
You moms and dads understand this love. You protect your children. You shield them from the world. You make sure you don't say certain things to them. You don't allow them to hear certain stories, you don't like them to be cussed in front of, and you protect them from people that would otherwise hurt them. You protect them like they're special, because they are. Dave doesn't love me like you love your children, but he protects me in the same way.
Dave is part of a group of men online. They're all friends and they discuss everything. Just like I have my friends that come sit on my couch and talk about everything with me; he has them. We'll talk about stuff that they say, and it cracks me up. I asked him one time if they know about me. He said, "Of course not. They're not good enough to know you." It hit me then, stronger than it ever had before. For the 1st time since we got married 3 years before, it clicked why he would always say, "You're my Pearl." He loves me and protects me as though I'm the most special gem in the world. He doesn't talk about our life, share our intimate details with others, or let people know the truly unique parts of our life, because he chooses to not "cast his pearls before swine." It's a choice.
I'm not saying that people are bad, and that I'm amazing. If that's what this sounds like, forgive me. That's not my point. My point is to simply thank my husband for treating me like my Dad always taught me to strive for. The way that he loved and protected me when I was little. He treats me how I deserve to be treated, because I cherish him like he deserves. I love him the way he deserves. I respect, and honor him the way that I was taught by my mother. 
Dave loves me, and I love him. Because of that love, we protect ourselves from everything in this world that would look to hurt that bond that we have with one another. We've chosen to put our marriage first. We've chosen to love the other person, respect the other person, and protect the other person, the way that we want to be loved, respected, and protected. 
Marriage is a sacred experience. I'm talking about EVERY MARRIAGE ON EARTH. Marriage is sacred. It's special. It's something to be treasured and protected. You've made a commitment to one another that it's you against the world. You've chosen to walk with that person by your side, as your partner in crime. There's nothing more special, rare, or sacred, as a marriage between 2 committed human beings. It's sacred because it's a choice that you both make. You both sign on that dotted line. You both hold hands and jump in. You choose them, and they choose you. What's more special than that?
I'm honored to be Dave's chosen love. I'm blessed that he's allowed me to choose, and have him. I'm lucky to get to wake up every day to his beautiful face, and face everything this life throws at us, together. It's a gift. It's special. There's nothing I'd rather do more. It's hard, it takes work, and it takes commitment. It's the hardest thing that you'll ever experience, and the most beautiful choice you'll ever make. 
The honor I have of being Dave's "Pearl" is the greatest gift I've ever been given. My marriage is the most special thing to me on this earth, and being allowed to do it with the man that cherishes, and loves me, is something that no word could ever do justice. It's simply special. It's beautiful, and special. Nothing will ever compare, and I'm thankful that God loved me enough to send that boy into that gym that day. It'll go down as the greatest day in my life. The day my life changed forever. I wouldn't have it any other way.